We had a great time, but I felt a nagging twinge of sadness. I tried to cheer myself up with bumper sticker sayings like, "don't believe everything you think", and reminded myself it was that time and I was just feeling sensitive. A group of young mothers sat gossiping, laughing, commiserating. I watched them from the sidelines, outwardly smiling, but secretly missing my own friends, missing that female comaraderie.
Later, after a few miscommunications with M. (my tender self took everything personally) an accidental headbutt to my lip from my son (amazingly painful!), a wrestling match called teeth brushing and two toddlers frustrated by the book selection, the flood gates opened. M. and I got them in my lap, a book ready to go, but I couldn't say anything. It was that silence you hold when the tears are right there. Boo looked up at me, wondering why I wasn't saying anything so I decided to read, voice cracking and all. M. took over while I sobbed in the chair. It only took a couple moments before I felt better and the kids didn't really seem to notice, although I suppose it's not the end of the world if they see their mommy cry. She's human too. Boy is she ever!
P.S. I'm feeling fine now.
A few seconds after this, a two inch tall 'wave' caused Bear to topple into the frigid water. Not a happy camper!
Their first taste of the milkshake (Mom's idea) responsible for the sugar crash an hour later.
1 comment:
I wish I could give you a big hug right now. It isn't fair that women get to have moods that are up, down, sideways, and all over the place. You let yourself pour it all out. Good for you!!Boo and bear just got to witness mom having a human experience. They are so adorable in their beach wear. They would fit in over here. So when are you coming?
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